Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Just so you are aware...
I write at a 5th graders level.
Ambiguity is not tolerated.
Random thoughts/facts will appear randomly. 
Thanksgiving weekend 2009 + unprotected sex = baby on the way!  
I tend to be overly honest with inappropriate descriptions. 

The WIC program in Marshalltown, Iowa slaps the WIC program in Kansas City, Kansas in the face. The woman here in Marshalltown were more helpful, educated, friendly, and attractive. (I find it easier to communicate with someone if they are attractive.) The amount of money given in fresh fruits and veggies is three dollars higher each month in Iowa than it is in Kansas. I can buy real Cheerios and not the generic Heerios. (That by the way tastes like sawdust that has been stuck in-between an old mans fingernail and finger.)

WIC definition:
Women, Infants, and Children - serves to safeguard the health of low-income women, infants, & children up to age 5 who are at nutritional risk by providing nutritious foods to supplement diets, WIC provides information on healthy eating, and referrals to health care.

During my pregnancy I have developed sciatica which has successfully made sleeping nonproductive and trying to get to sleep a huge inconvenience. After discussing this huge inconvenience with my doctor he felt I should start physical therapy and try a maternity body pillow. I started out with a Boppy Total Body Pillow and it was flatter than a anorexic woman's chest. When that bobby failed me I decided to try a different brand, I bought a Leachco Snoogle Body Pillow and poof nigh night time was easier than a whore on Troost. 

Ultrasound at 20 weeks showed my mini with a healthy heart, all limbs functioning and a penis!

Sciatica definition:

Sciatica refers to pain and discomfort associated with the sciatic nerve. This nerve runs from the lower part of the spinal cord, down the back of the buttocks, into the thigh and down to the foot. Injury to or pressure on the sciatic nerve can cause the characteristic pain of sciatica: a sharp or burning pain that radiates from the lower back or hip, following the path of the sciatic nerve to the foot.

Leachco = made by Jesus Christ
Boppy = Fail 

1 comment:

  1. leachco - not as fun to say as "boppy" but looks more comfortable even if you're not with child. just saying.